An Addict's Journal

                                I had been planning to quit work and take it easy for quite sometime now. Nobody knows about this , so I was pretty surprised when the receptionist handed me a 'private and confidential'  letter  from the company boss. Damn the sly bugger had seen through me and  I was getting the sack. Tore open the letter with a devil may care attitude and viola ive got a pay rise ! I still dont think it will make a difference  to my earlier decision.

I like to do wild crazy or pointless things on a quite regular basis. My mission for today was to find a WHS Smith store in Oxford Street. I did a thorough check with the trusty rusty cycle at my disposal. Lesson: no smith shops in Oxford Circus. Today went on an eating binge... anything to get the endorphins up. Feel bloated and tired. Once again today seriously thought of reoffending,  but somehow managed to  push my thoughts to less turbulent waters. Well done old man, keep hanging in there

Watched the regal Federer in the Open down under. I remember him saying in an interview that he just focuses on the point at hand never bothering about the score , crowd or anything else interfere between him and the game. The focus on the present moment, a Zen like quality which almost makes him a Buddhist monk.

I dont think writing a blog will really cure me. There's no cure, once an addict , always an addict.  But  I hope to find out what exactly causes me to reoffend. What goes on in my mind... the evening was spent watching a couple of episodes of the frst series of 'That 70s show' with friends. Its back to work tomorrow.

 Yestreday had to stuggle for an hour before i could blog. The goddamn site kept refusing to post my entries. The font colour looks awful, tried changing it a million times and failed. Today is my first day clean and God its awful at times. Went for 'the icons of london' by Greg London. Not bad for a guy who does impressions of singers. Got stood up by the girl I was supposed to see it with. Man this year sucks.

Trying to go clean for 2 weeks pretty ambitious.... the maximum ive stayed clean so far is 5 weeks. So it is pretty ambitious. Ha for the man with nothing to lose...but for now for today i am CLEAN.

I am an addict. After my latest high and the rock bottom low afterwards ive decided to come clean. Foolhardy maybe but i have decided to undertake the journey alone. ill post here as often as possible starting maybe on a daily basis. Its unchartered territory for me and I expect myself to slip up along the way... Honesty is the key i think. so here i am in the midnight hour starting on a journey with no end in sight.